


Killers and Renegades, Liars and Thieves

by artemistheacegoddess



Category: Dream SMP - Fandom, Minecraft (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Steampunk, Blaze Hybrid Tommy Innit, Dream is a villain, Found Family, Gen, Goat Hybrid Toby Smith | Tubbo, Human Experimentation, Hurt/Comfort, Immortality, Jschlatt is Toby Smith | Tubbo's Parent, Kinda, Mild Angst, Piglin Hybrid Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), Siren Wilbur Soot, Technically major character death, Temporary Character Death, The Mechanisms-Typical Violence, Villain Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), Winged Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), all tw in proper chapters, but nobody stays dead for more than 15 minutes ok, everything will end happy though dw, immortality AU, mechs au, schlatt is only there briefly and he is also not really a good person, so you can skip if you need to, that make them immortal, there's some fighting and blood and stuff but nothing is described in depth, they all have mechanical body parts, they die but they all come back dw, you don't have to listen to The Mechanisms to read this
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-12
Updated: 2021-03-03
Packaged: 2021-03-12 09:54:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,751
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29383074
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/artemistheacegoddess/pseuds/artemistheacegoddess
Summary: They said immortality was lonely, but honestly there are probably too many people on this ship
Relationships: Ranboo & Technoblade (Video Blogging RPF), Ranboo & Toby Smith | Tubbo & Wilbur Soot & Technoblade & TommyInnit & Phil Watson, Technoblade & Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF), Tubbo & Tommyinnit, Wilbur Soot & Technoblade & TommyInnit & Phil Watson, all platonic!!!!
Comments: 14
Kudos: 84





	1. A Man Both Good And True

Phil swung his sword out, slashing through waves of mobs. Around him, his hunting group did the same, trying to get enough space to spread their wings and fly back home. Skeleton’s fell before him, their brittle bones shattering at the hit of his sword. An arrow whizzed past, and he ducked, just barely missing the sharp tip, but a new arrow caught him in the arm. He winced in pain as it pierced through a chink in his armor. His friend Arja was struggling to fight off several spiders, but before he could help her a new horde of zombies approached, the stench of rotten flesh surrounding him. His group hadn’t meant to get caught out at night, but the herd of cows they had been hunting had taken longer than they intended to chase down, and the sun had set before they knew it.

Finally, he managed to clear himself enough room, but just as he was about to take off he saw something out of the corner of his eye. A baby zombie. His sky village had recently received a shipment of blaze powder to cure zombies, and although it was only supposed to be for Villagers and not humans, he knew his superiors wouldn’t object. It was a child, he couldn’t just leave it to burn in the daylight. He turned himself towards it and began to swoop down, just as one of the other hunters began to head towards it. He landed with his shield up, just as they swung towards him, blocking the likely fatal blow to the child.

“Phil, what are you doing?!”, they shouted over the commotion of battle.

“It’s just a child! We can cure it!”, He responded, still shielding the kid.

“It’s a human, Phil, they’ve killed so many of us!”

Hearing the commotion Arja ran over, her large wings flapping behind her.

“Phil?”, she said, “Let us kill the zombie”

“Arja, we can save it! Why would we kill it?”

Arja slowed, and narrowed her eyes, realizing this wasn’t an accident.

“Philza, you know what the punishment is for treason. If you back off now, we won’t mention this to the council when we get back home.”

Phil’s wings flared behind him reflecting his shock and anger, “Treason? Arja, I’m protecting a child”

She turned to the small crowd that had gathered around them and nodded.  
As a unit, the group of hunters Phil had worked with for years, some of his best friends, lunged at him. He fought back trying to escape the seemingly endless grasping arms and wings trying to hold him down, but there were so many. He managed to dodge one person, but felt another’s grip on his arm. He yanked away from them, only to be tackled from behind. He broke free of their hold, but felt someone restrain his wings. On and on it went, but they were all tired and there were so many more of them than there was of him. In the end, they managed to restrain him, putting him in handcuffs and restraining his wings as they flew him up to their cloud city to face his judgement.

He was being kept in a small cell as he awaited trial. It was dark, the small barred window allowing almost no natural light. He paced back and forth on the concrete floor, awaiting his trial. When it was time, he was led out into a large open air room, delicate arches above each of the large thrones, gilded in platinum.

The council sat in their thrones. Each wore matching robes, and sat completely still, their faces solemn. Phil was thrown on the ground in front of them, still bound. He hadn’t slept in the hours they had held him in prison since that night, and large dark circles underlined his eyes.

“Philza Minecraft”, one Council Member began, “You have broken our most sacred law, and attempted to protect a human, thus committing treason under Aerie law. Do you know the consequences for such an act?” 

Phil nodded. Everyone knew what happened to traitors. It was the worst punishment possible. Worse than death.

“Then, you may give us your defense”

Phil stood up, and cleared his throat.

“Just hours before the incident, our village received a shipment of blaze powder. Immediately this was used to make potions to cure zombie Villagers. However, we did not use this to help human zombies. That makes sense. The humans have hurt us immeasurably, and not wanting to help them is valid. However, to not help a child, who wasn’t even alive during the wars is ridiculous. Whether or not that child is human, it is innocent and deserves our help. Isn’t one of the great tenets of our people, ‘Protect those who cannot protect themselves’”

The Council Leader narrowed her eyes, and turned to discuss with the others.  
After a few moments of hushed whispers, they returned to him and his anxious waiting.  
“And does anyone here have any new information, beyond the defense already given by Mr. Minecraft himself?”

Phil closed his eyes, desperately pleading to any deity that would listen that someone would speak up in his defense. The courtroom was deadly silent, beyond the incredibly fast beat of his heart. He didn’t dare hope that maybe his family would step up for him, that might condemn them as well, but maybe? The silence stretched for what felt like an eternity before the Council sighed.

“Alright. Then Philza Minecraft, I sentence you to permanent exile, stripped of your wings.”

He felt the shock begin to bleed into him, the fear he’d held in his chest coiling tight around his heart, they were going to take away his wings. His freedom,his safety. They were condemning him to a life running from predators, an early death. But more than that, he languished the fact that in his final days he would be unable to feel the sky’s embrace. The chill air under his feathers,the song of the breeze in his ears. Silent tears slipped down his face, as they dragged him from the courtroom. 

He didn’t remember much of the rest. A few hours passed in a blur of acceptant mourning. A man dressed in all black leading him away. The sight of a superheated blade. The searing pain against his wings. Dark grey feathers on the ground, smoking slightly. The cool night air against his bare back. The full moon. The sounds of mobs. An arrow in his thigh. Branches scraping him as he ran. Bright green. A voice offering release. The darkness of blissful nothing.


	2. Stark and Brilliant

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Philza woke up on an operating table, in a large room filled with a strange mix of robotic and medical equipment

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, folks just as a warning there's a bit of medical experimentation this chapter, nothing graphic at all, but I figured it's better to warn people. It starts at "Phil awoke to pure agony..." and ends with "He woke in his bed again..." I'll put a quick summary at the bottom.

Philza woke up on an operating table, in a large room filled with a strange mix of robotic and medical equipment. He tried to sit up, but his back protested, aching in pain. What had happened? He remembered being exiled, stripped of his wings, but everything after that was fuzzy.

“How’s your back feeling?”

Phil whipped around trying to see the source of the voice, but was distracted by the searing pain and clanking of metal. Once, the white spots had cleared from his vision, he looked up at the man in front of him. He was rather short, and wore fairly simple traveling clothes, except for the fact that they were all bright green. His face was hardly visible, instead covered by a thick pure white mask with a crude smile painted on, revealing only his lips, which were currently carved into a static smile.

Phil stared up at him, “I- What happened to me?”

“I found you stumbling around in the woods, practically bleeding out, so I figured you would be a good start to my new crew, and I saved you!”

Phil finally allowed himself to look behind him, to the place where his wings should be. He saw behind him a pair of wings, not the ones he knew, the ones that had been torn from him. These were made entirely of metal, incredibly intricate and beautiful. He stared at them in awe, between horror at the realization that his wings were truly gone and awe at the beauty of these replacements.

The masked man seemed to catch on to his stunned silence, “Do you like them? They took forever to make, and almost as long to attach. You died like 5 times during the process!”

The way he said that so matter of fact, Phil turned and stared at him in horror.

“I died? Who the fuck are you?”

“Oh! I can’t believe I forgot to introduce myself! I’m Dream, welcome to my ship The SMP.”

“Ok… ok. You still haven’t explained to me how I died so many times, and how I am alive now?” Phil said, panic still evident in his voice.

“Well, you’re immortal now, I would have thought that was obvious”, Dream said, “Those wings are called a mechanism, every time you die, you’ll just heal right back up! You still feel pain though”

Phil just stared at him in shock.

“Well, c’mon. If you’re going to be my first mate I have to show you the ship.”

Phil wanted to like Dream, this kind immortal who had rescued him, but the way he spoke so perfectly neutrally happy, enunciating every word perfectly, the way his smile never wavered, it scared him. He felt like he could remove the mask and see nothing but the void behind it. Honestly, Dream terrified him, his niceness felt so fake, like it would only last for as long as Phil was useful. But if he was to be the man’s first mate or whatever, he should trust him so he pushed aside his trepidation as Dream stopped in front of one last door. 

“Now, this is your room! Feel free to customise it however you want, SMP will help if it can.”

Dream left him to his own devices and Phil sat down on his bed, falling asleep in moments. 

For the next few months (or so he thought, time didn’t seem to work quite right on this ship), Dream was nowhere to be found. On the few occasions, Phil did run into him he was awkward and left as soon as he could. So, instead Phil explored the seemingly ever expanding ship. And as it turned out,the SMP was sentient. He’d discovered that when one day, he went a bit too far and got lost. The corridors all looked the same, and the signs on the walls were nowhere to be found. He was just about to resign himself to wandering these halls forever, when the screen next to him lit up. 

“Hello. You seem lost. Do you want me to fetch Captain Dream?”

“Oh fuck me! You can talk?”, Phil yelled, jumping at the sudden voice.

“Yes. Would you like me to fetch Captain Dream?”

Phil hesitated, “Uh, let’s not do that. Could you just lead me back to my room?”

“Of course.”

He walked back in silence, following the arrows that the ship laid out for him, until he finally found his quarters.He opened the door, but paused before entering.

“SMP?”

“Yes?”

“Am I safe here?”, he asked, the hugeness of the ship seeming to swallow his voice.

“As safe as you could be.” the ship answered.

He nodded, he supposed that was the best he could hope for. He slept a little lighter that night, but soundly nonetheless.

Phil awoke to a pure agony unlike any he’d ever experienced before. His face was pressed against something hard and solid, and his back felt like someone had stabbed it, burnt it, and then covered it in acid, all at the same time. He was vaguely aware of something oozing down his side. It was all so intense, he could hardly think. He thought he heard someone screaming. Maybe it was him? The last thing he heard before he died again was the voice of Dream, still as smooth as ever.

“Hmmm, I guess the anesthesia wore off. Please stop screaming, I can’t concentrate.”

He woke in his bed again, the sound of his own screams echoing through his head, which felt like it’d been stuffed with cotton balls. The room swam around him, and his back ached where the metal joined bone. His memories of the night before were fuzzy, but he still remembered the callousness of Dream’s voice. At this thought, he clenched his fists. That man had- what had he even done? Experimented on Phil while he was sleeping? White hot anger flowed through his veins. That was just not something you do to another human being!

“SMP!”, he called out. A small bing from the console on his wall let him know that the ship was present.

“Where is Dream.”, he said, his voice cold.

“The captain has asked to be left alone. Can I help you instead?”

“If you won’t tell me, I’ll find him myself!”

“I cannot tell you. Though you should stay away from his lab.”

His eyes softened, just a little, “Thank you.”

He ran down the hall, to see Dream leaving his lab.

“Dream!”, he yelled out.

The man stopped, turning to face him and cocking his head.

“What the actual fuck did you do last night?”

The man smiled, “Oh you mean when I was working on your mechanism? That’s not new, I’ve been doing that all the time! Unfortunately, your anesthetic wore off last night so you woke up.”

Phil stilled, his face hardening, “What do you mean you do that ‘all the time’”

“Exactly what I said!”

Phil’s fist flew out and cracked against Dream’s porcelain mask. A small break began to spread along the bottom of it. 

For a moment they both stood in stunned silence. Then Phil punched him again. And again, and again. Dream just stood there smiling as he received the beating.

“You.” Punch. “Will.” Punch. “Never.” Punch “Do this.” Punch “Again” Punch.

Dream was on the ground, his mask had fallen away almost entirely, his face still frozen in his solid amusement. 

“No more experimentation. No more crew. No one else should be subjected to this.”

Dream just smiled wider, “If you say so.”

Phil stepped over him, walking into the lab, prepared to destroy all his equipment. There laying on the table, plugged into a mix of electric wires and IVs, covered in far too much blood was a young piglin hybrid.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Summary of the part I outlined at top: Phil wakes up to Dream experimenting on his mechanism without consent, and basically immediately passes out again.
> 
> I got a lot of writing done because I had a long weekend, so new chapter! Also can you tell I'm bad at writing introductions to my concepts asdfghjkjhgfd


	3. Their Flowing Blood Implores You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Techno's origin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Violence, Light Blood/Gore, Character Death (the only permanent ones are background characters like without names)

Technoblade awoke suddenly to the sound of metal scraping against stone. He layed completely still, not changing his breathing patterns, but he wrapped his hand around the sword he kept next to him at all times. He heard footsteps as the person in his room approached, their breathing heavy. They stopped at his bedside, and then he heard the small whoosh of a sword being swung through the air. 

Their swords clanged together as Techno blocked the attack. Quicker than the attacker could comprehend, Techno was on his feet, and prepared to fight. The assassin was quick, but very sloppy, their strokes messy leaving them open. It wasn’t a hard fight, Techno lazily dodged a few strikes, parried a quick overhead swing, before driving his sword through the chest of the attacker. They fell on the ground dead, and Techno sighed. He supposed he might as well get dressed now, there was no way he was going back to sleep now.

His crown and cape were heavy upon his head. It was comforting in a way, a reminder that he had weight too now. He was no longer the lonely orphan on the streets fighting for scraps. He was the king now, and he was important. The assassins, the fearful eyes of others, the weight of almost a whole planet on his shoulders didn’t faze him in the slightest. It was like he was born for this. 

He mused on this as he looked out the window. Below him the crimson covered planet stretched for miles, its dark red trees lit by the warm glow of shroomlight. The dark brick path leading away from the palace was surrounded by buildings and huts made of the crimson wood, and other piglins and piglin hybrids were beginning to start their days as well. 

Piglins choose their ruler by strength. If you can defeat the current monarch in a mortal combat, you now rule. Technoblade had been king for 2 years now. He had defeated the previous king when he was 17, and every attempted assassin since then. 

He smiled a bit, energy running under his skin. The voices, he’d heard them for as long as he remembered, they wanted blood again. He could deny them, but when they desired something as simple of blood, it was easier to just indulge them. 

He flagged down his personal assistant Hubert, to tell him to prepare the challengers who want “a chance at the crown”, Hubert smiles knowing the carnage that is about to ensue.

The arena was large, and full of screaming people. Techno tuned them out, he was used to screaming voices. The sandy dirt crunched slightly under his foot, and he twirled his trident, Rocket Launcher in his other hand and his sword prepared on his belt. He loaded up a firecracker, and smirked as the gates began to open, revealing waves of attackers, probably about 30 people this time around. The voices grew louder at this promise of blood, chanting loudly.

The first of the attackers came towards him and the slaughter began. His rocket launcher took care of a few. The glittering explosion of red and black hiding their bloodied bodies until the sparks faded. When he could he threw his trident, which took out a sizable chunk. Eventually, the crowd got a bit too close for comfort and he dropped his launcher, and changed it out for a sword, slicing through the horde. Most of them never even got close until he stood in a wasteland of dead bodies, covered in blood. He laughed, and picked up his blood covered crown,the gold glinting in the shroomlight of the arena.

He placed it on his head, just as a final competitor entered the arena. He wore light clothes, they would be solid fighting clothes if they weren’t neon green. He wore on his face a mask with a painted smiley face on it. He was fairly well armoured, and clearly a well trained fighter. Techno could see him smirk as he approached, the way he walked reminding Techno of the way a predator stalked their prey.The man lunged at him, twin short swords slashing out wards. Techno parried, and pushed forwards, advancing on him with his much larger greatsword, but the man was more skilled than a normal competitor, and he slipped out from under Techno’s blade and ran behind him. As Techno whipped around, the man stabbed his sword outwards, and cut a bloody line across Techno’s face. The crowd around them screamed at the sight of the Blood God’s blood being spilt. Even if it was just a scratch. Techno shook his head advancing harder, forcing the man to focus on parrying his blows, but with his two swords and Techno getting much closer than he should have the mystery man managed to get in a few more cuts, largely to his arms. Then, he saw a flash of the man throwing something, and with a small vwoop the man disappeared from right under his blade. Techno felt a sharp pain as the man’s swords cut a X across his back, he turned around and attempted to trip the man with his sword, but he caught on too quickly and instead stabbed his sword through the king’s arm. He felt his bones shatter, and he rushed to pick up his sword with his other arm, even as white spots swirled in his vision. The pain only increased his drive to beat this sorry bastard though, and he began to attack his one-handed sloppy strikes seeming to catch the man off guard. Techno kicked him onto the ground, and foot on his chest prepared to push the blade through his heart. Just before he could, the man sputtered out a few last words.

“Do you want to be immortal?”, he said, his eyes cold under the shattered remnants of his mask.

“I already am”

The blade stabbed through his chest, killing this mysterious man instantly. 

The crowd rose, screaming in the victory of their king. Technoblade walked away silently, preparing to tend to his wounds among cries of “Technoblade never dies!”

Techno sat down against the wall in his room, dumping the pile of bandages on to the floor. He had pretended out in the halls to be the great victorious king he had been that morning, but the truth was he was shaken. He had almost lost that battle, and to one person. If someone else that strong came along, he didn’t know if he could repeat that performance. Even worse, in the last moments of the man’s life, he had realized that he was human, but that didn’t make any sense. Coccum didn’t allow humans, and hadn’t for many years. Sure there were always a few smuggled onto the planet, but surely none could get into his royal competition, the safest and most dangerous spot on the planet? It was disconcerting to say the least, but Techno couldn’t think too hard on a solution while his arm was shattered. He began to wrap it up, and winced in pain as he moved into a position he could put it into a sling with. He would have to stay out of the public eye for a few days while this healed up a bit. 

Behind him, he heard the sound of a door creaking open, and someone walking towards him. 

“Hubert, did you bring me something to eat”, he sighed.

There was no response.

He turned around, confused at his assistant's silence, only to come face to face with the visage of a man who should be dead. The man he had killed just 30 minutes before was standing in front of him, perfectly alive and apparently unharmed. His bright green eyes stared into Techno’s red ones and in them not the hatred or envy that he would have expected, but a simple pity and beneath that an untameable excitement.

“Gods don’t bleed, silly king” 

Techno felt the burning, overwhelming pain of a sword through his chest, and then he felt nothing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> in case this wasn't clear this chapter takes place before last chapter! also, sorry it took so long, the only reasons i have are: school and gae

**Author's Note:**

> For once I actually have some of this pre-written AND I have a plan for like all of this. So here's my sbi mechs au! Should update about once a week, depending on how fast I write!


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